Lend Me Your Ears

Today's passage:  II Samuel 22:1-7
     "When the waves of death compassed me, the floods of ungodly men made me afraid;  The sorrows of hell compassed me about; the snares of death prevented me; In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God:  and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears."
     Men are often accused of having selective hearing.  They heard "football game on TV" but not "Please ask son's teacher about such and such".  But I'm sorry to throw us under the bus ladies, I know I have it too.  Especially when I'm in the middle of doing something.  When my husband says to turn off the coffee pot warmer before I leave the house so the coffee doesn't burn, I heard what he said.  But apparently I didn't process it and really let it sink in.  Because what did I do the other day, right after he said it?  I left the house for numerous hours with the coffee pot warmer still on.  I'm fortunate to be married to a very laid-back, easygoing husband who never gives me criticism.  And I deserve a lot, I'm afraid.
   The end of verse 7 says David's cry entered into God's ears.  God always hears our prayers.  I could be wrong, but the verse that says God doesn't hear our prayer if I regard iniquity in my heart, doesn't mean He doesn't actually hear us.  He just isn't paying attention and will not answer.  Does that mean God has selective hearing too?  I guess when we refuse to relent of some sin in our life that He has pointed out to us time and time again, it does.  I suppose when we ask for something, and we are too stubborn or proud to say "I'm sorry", God ignores us.  But in the above verses, God didn't just hear David.  His prayer went into God's ears.  And unless sin is blocking our way, God always intently hears our prayers.  Have you ever been in a conversation, and had the sense that the person you were talking to was distracted, or that you didn't have their full attention?  I know sometimes I have been that person.  And I hate that because I really want to hear what the person is saying, but if my two year old is about to poke himself in the eye with a sharp object or my four year old is climbing yet again on some non-sturdy structure, my attention is going to be a little divided.  God has a whole world to listen to, but He is not once distracted by his children who are involved in some ungodly activity while another who needs His help is pouring out prayers over her little one.  He can equally hear the prayers going up at a church service and the prayers going up at the hospital.  And He doesn't just hear one and listen to the other.  They both enter into His ears.

Hear My Prayer--Taken from Standard Bible Story Readers, Book One
By Lillie A. Faris, Illustrated by O.A. Stemler and Bess Bruce Cleaveland
The Standard Publishing Company, 1925

     This is great assurance because like David, I'm living in a "flood of ungodly men".  This sinful world gets worse every day.  News stories are evidence of that. It isn't going to improve. Things might improve for individuals if they give their lives to Christ, but as a nation, as a planet, conditions will grow steadily worse.  It is a good thing that a prayer of salvation enters into God's ears and He can deliver a person from the "sorrows of hell" and the "snares of death".  It is a comfort that when I feel surrounded by sin and darkness, when evil is prevalent and engulfs me, God doesn't just hear me, my prayer enters into His ears and He will answer.
    "I will call on the LORD, who is worthy to be praised:  so shall I be saved from mine enemies."  II Samuel 22:4

Promises, Promises

Today's passage:  II Samuel 15
      It looks as if David's reign as king is over.  David can not know any differently.  After all, he has sat on the throne for a while now.  The one who wants to take his throne is his own son.  It is not as if God has not kept his promise to David.  The Lord told David that his kingdom would continue on, that his line would sire the Messiah.  Both parts of God's promise will still be fulfilled if Absalom's rebellion is successful.  Now David (a much older man by now) is weeping in the wilderness, wondering whether he will die here.
     That beguiling son of David had charmed the people into thinking he should be king now, instead of when David died.  He convinced the people that David did not care about the problems of the common man.  He disciplined himself (good to know he was disciplined about something) to wake and arrive early at the city gate each morning.  He greeted and campaigned, listened to the people's gripes and offered his solutions.  Sounds a little like a presidential candidate.  Only Absalom doesn't want to wait for an election, he wants to oust his father and replace him.  Why the hurry?  Absalom was the next successor to the throne.  Why shouldn't he bide his time?  I think partly because he wants to hurt his father.  His feelings of pride at not having been received by David as soon as he was invited back to the palace are still strong.  He wants to show good old Dad that he will make a better king.  He certainly can't do that when the old man is dead, so he must prove it to him while he is living.

Absalom's rebellion (cropped)--Taken from Religion in the Home (Part 4)  The United Kingdom
By Charlotte M. Yonge, Illustrated by Julius Schnorr von Karolsfeld
Published by George W. Bertron, 1913

     David can't be sure that God is not in this usurping.  He knows it is not the way God would have done things, but he does not know if this is not a plan of God to teach some lessons.  He can not be sure that his kingship is over, that God will move him onto new things, that maybe He will move him into Heaven.  David has no way of being able to see ahead to know any differently.  He can see his mistakes.  He is looking back at the way Absalom was raised and realizing what he could have been wiser.  He is praying that he will have another chance to do things right by Absalom, to be the leader God wants him to be.  All those years in the wilderness, preparing for the monarchy, did not prepare him that he would one day be back here.  All the opportunities he had to take Saul's life, and spared him, was not taken into account for his own throne.  Where was the law of sowing and reaping?  David had showed such high regard for the man God allowed to wear the crown.  Why wasn't God allowing David to have some measure of that respect shown towards himself?  Why is God allowing David to be so dishonored?  I know David's possible folly in rearing Absalom will bring about consequences.  But isn't it strange that the consequences God should choose to allow come to David would be in something he would never have been involved?  David would have never plotted against Saul, looking for ways to win the hearts of the people (even though he had those hearts early in Saul's reign).  David could have whispered all of the court secrets about Saul's moodiness around the palace, influencing them that he should no longer be their leader.  David could have abused this and taken the throne from Saul.  David could have raised an army of supporters while in the wilderness and stormed the castle, ousting Saul from his position.  David could have made Jonathan (the next in line) his enemy rather than his bosom friend. It just seems odd that God would choose this set of circumstances.  I think that if it had not been David's own flesh and blood leading this coup, he would have had his armed men destroy the usurper.  Since it was his own son, not only would he not want to harm him, but he could not know whether his time on the throne had expired, and God was allowing his son to reign in his stead.  David knew what God had promised him, but he did not know just how God was going to keep this promise.  Remember this covenant?

II Samuel 7:12-15

12 And when thy days be fulfilled, and thou shalt sleep with thy fathers, I will set up thy seed after thee, which shall proceed out of thy bowels, and I will establish his kingdom.

13  He shall build an house for my name, and I will stablish the throne of his kingdom for ever.

14  I will be his father, and he shall be my son.  If he commit iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men:

15  But my mercy shall not depart away from him, as I took it from Saul, whom I put away before thee.

16  And thine house and thy kingdom shall be established for ever before thee:  thy throne shall be established for ever.  

     There is nothing in this promise that says how long it will be before David will sleep with his fathers.  This could be the time for that.  David does not know.  Absalom is his seed, so God is honoring the covenant He established with David.  It is David's prayer that this is not the end, but he can't know for sure.  And I can't be critical of David's seeming lack of faith, because given the evidence, David's time might be up.
     I can remind God of His promises, but I can't tell Him how to carry them out.  David knows this too.  He is humbled by what God is doing in his life.  He knows God has given him a promise and he will cling to that, but he can't know just how God will fulfill it.  God has promised us a lot of things in His Word.  Some of those things will be realized while I am living but some of them won't be realized until I am sleeping with my fathers.  And I don't know how soon that may be.  It may be tomorrow, it may not be for another forty years. In any case, when God surprises me yet again with the way He chooses to do things, and it wasn't the way I expected, I have to trust and believe that He will get more glory doing it His Way.
      Why does God allow David to go through this?  Why does He allow his reign to be compromised in a most disrespectful way?  I can't say.  I know that David was not wrong to be an honorable follower under Saul.  I know that David did not do that thinking in the back of his mind, "When I am king someday, people will show me the same respect."  The sowing and reaping principle does not always parallel our lives exactly.  The loyalty that David displayed will be realized in the son who will eventually take the throne.  God has to prepare the way for Solomon, in order to carry out His Word to David, and getting Absalom out of the way is how God will get there.
     God's promises have never failed.  Not then, not today.

Heads or Tails

Today's passage:  I Samuel 12
    Heads, you win.  Tails, you lose.  I think some people think this is how God handles our lives.  That somehow God is up in Heaven flipping a coin, and depending on which side faces up is how He will deal with us.  I'm thankful that my God is so much more complex than that.
     Reading this passage about David's brokenness over the consequences for his sin, reminds me a bit of "Heads or Tails", not because that is how God deals with Him, but because we are apt to think that if David says some kind of magic prayer, he will end up with the heads side of the coin and everything will be hunky-dory.  God does not work that way.  If our lives were just a coin to God, why is it so many people have more Tails than Heads?  If our lives were just a flip in the air, leaving things to chance, then we would have no reason to live in a way that was pleasing to God, because the outcome would never have any connection to how we lived.

The Death of David and Bathsheba's Son--Taken from Treasures of the Bible (The United Kingdom)
By Henry Davenport Northrop, D.D.
The International Publishing Company, 1894

     In this passage, God could have spared David's unborn child.  He could have considered David's heartfelt pleas and stayed His Hand.  But He doesn't.  It is not because David got the Tails side of the coin.  It is because God knows how best to handle David's heart.  He knows how best to handle mine.  When I was a teen, there was a song by a pop music parody master that said, "I'd rather rip my heart right out of my rib cage with my bare hands and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it til I die..."  Humorous, but haven't we all had those moments?  Those times in our life when it felt like God was ripping our heart out of our chest and holding it in His bare but capable Hands?  Or worse, throwing it to the floor and stomping on it?  David's face to the ground, his eyes overflowing with tears, his heart too full for food or company is pleading for God's mercy.  Doesn't God hear him?  Shouldn't God spare him?  I can't answer that.  I can't understand God's ways.  I know that David is not the only one who had sinned.  Who knows that God's decision to bring this judgement might not have been for Bathsheba?  He was holding her heart too.  God was not up in Heaven, laughing deviously, flipping a coin, saying, "Well, let's see how this all comes out.  I'll let this nickel decide."  God is purposeful.  God is just.  God wants my worship.  God wants my best.  He knows best how to achieve those things in my life, and in the lives of others.  And since I am not a navigator of hearts, I am not a spelunker of those inner caverns, I cannot pretend to know what God already does.  He holds that pulsating center of thoughts and emotions in His hands, and He knows how tightly to squeeze to get it pumping again.  He knows just how much pressure to apply to make it pulse for Him.
     Poor David.  I can say that, and my emotions be little affected because I didn't know him.  I can objectively read this passage and not be touched by his pain.  But there are people who have impacted my life, who may be in a similar situation as David was.  No, they may not be about to lose a child (or they may be), they may not have sinned as egregiously as David did, yet their sin is costing them.  God may have their heart that is in no way connected to mistakes or unholiness.  Those Davids may be beseeching God for mercy in their lives.  And God will give it.  But not necessarily in the situation they are in.  After God took David's child, despite the broken heart, the earnest prayers, God was merciful.  How?  God gave David another son, Solomon.  And He allowed him to win another battle against the Ammonites, the battle they should have won when Uriah was killed.  God created us.  He knows how best to keep us alive and afresh for Him.  Just because I say it doesn't make us automaton's devoid of emotion and reason, yahooing every difficult circumstance in our lives.  But it makes me feel a whole lot better knowing that the One who created my heart, knows exactly what to do with it.  And that gives me much more peace than a coin flip.

Bread-Making Day

Today's passage:  I Corinthians 5
     When I was a little girl, I have a clear memory of my Mom making fresh-baked bread.  I don't remember ever watching her assemble the dough, punching it and kneading it to get it bake-ready, but I remember the smell of that home-made bread.  The aroma filled the house.  I also remember having to be very careful shutting doors.  As I am not much of a baker, I don't know if that still applies today.  Anything that would send a jolt through the house, might cause the bread to fall, instead of rise.  You always want the bread to rise.  I never remember my grandmother baking bread.  Maybe that is because she lived down the road from the quarry, whose blasts we could hear nearly every day.  Baking in her house might have been highly unsuccessful.  In any case, there were occasions when Mom would pull the bread from the oven and it looked like a sinkhole had pulled the dough into itself.  When this occurred, we never celebrated.  We never cheered that the bread had deflated.  It was sad.  As the bread smell wafts through the house, you salivate and impatiently wait for the sound of the oven timer.  You have knife and plate ready to spread a pad of melting butter and crunch into the crispy crust. How disappointing when Mom would pull it from the oven and it was inedible, trying to whoa the taste buds until the next bread-making day.
     "Your glorying is not good.  Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump?"  Paul is chastening the church in Corinth for allowing someone who is openly practicing his sin to remain in the church.  Allowing it signals approval.  I am not even going to attempt to get into church discipline, I will leave that to a pastor, but I think there are some obvious teachings from the Scriptures that make it very clear that some situations have no business remaining in the church.  The Scriptures are very candid about unrepentant believers being admitted fellowship in the local congregation.  We live in a world of tolerance.  But we cannot be tolerant at any price.  The price being, that if a believer participating in a particular sin, and unwilling to relinquish it remains, it may start to grow in other areas of the church.  Why?  Because if he is allowed to remain, it seems as if it is okay.  If it is okay, then it will spread.  This is what Paul fears.  He admonishes the Corinthians to put this man out, since he appears to be unrepentant. 
     I don't ever remember eating a collapsed loaf of bread.  It is yeasty, doughy and not tasty.  It completely contrasts with the loaf we were expecting to get.  We usually threw it out.  A Christian who openly practices and participates in sin, without remorse, is like the bread that has not risen.  Everyone expects something quite different than what comes out of the oven.  A person who calls himself a Christian but practices the ways of the world, delivers a wrong concept about Christianity.  Whether we like it or not, the world holds us to a higher standard.  If we live less than the expectations, it is like delivering an unrisen loaf of bread.  The world expects to see that knife-ready golden crust.  They smell the home-made bread aroma throughout the house and have a good idea what a loaf should look and taste like.  It doesn't mean they will partake, but our lives should be enticing to them.  It should be pleasant to the eyes and nose.  None of us is perfect, but even the world knows activities a Christian should not be involved.  Just as we should not be proud when the bread does not rise, neither should we be happy about a Christian who falls away and refuses to repent.  We should not encourage them by keeping them in the church, but we should not whoop and holler because he has to be thrown out.  Neither response is desirable.  Wouldn't it be better if the Christian would just admit his sin, repent and be allowed to remain in fellowship?  This is obviously the most desirable outcome.  We want every Christian to thrive.  We want every Christian to walk with the Lord, but if he refuses to see the error of his ways, we do no favors to ourselves and to our churches by keeping inedible bread.  Maybe one day, he will scrap the old dough and be allowed to rise again.  That is the sincere hope.  Bread that rises is always something to anticipate.

Insignificant David

Today's passage:  I Samuel 16:1-13
     "And he said, Peaceably:  I am come to sacrifice unto the LORD:  sanctify yourselves, and come with me to the sacrifice.  And he sanctified Jesse and his sons, and called them to the sacrifice."
     I have a question.  God calls Samuel to go to Bethlehem to anoint the next king.  Samuel fears for his life, because if Saul discovers his errand, he will kill him.  This tells me that Saul was never truly repentant at the end of the last chapter, or he would have accepted God's consequences for his behavior.  For him to interfere with Samuel on this, means he had not accepted God's punishment.  That is not my question. 
     When Samuel arrives in Bethlehem, the townspeople are fearful.  They want to know if Samuel has come in peace.  My guess is, Samuel had been known to be Saul's mouthpiece, and Saul had not exactly been an easy king.  The last verse of Chapter 14 says that whenever Saul saw a strong or valiant man, he would recruit him for his battles.  Perhaps the Bethlehemites are concerned that Samuel has been sent for this mission, to scout the town for future soldiers.  But this is not my question either.

David Plays the Lyre--taken from the Standard Bible Story Reader, Book One
by Lillie A. Faris, illustrated by O.A. Stemler and Bess Bruce Cleaveland,
The Standard Publishing Company, 1927

     Samuel assures the people that he has come to sacrifice to the Lord.  This has been his habit in the past, to go from town to town and offer sacrifices.  Samuel presents himself to Jesse, asks them to do their ritual cleansing before offering to the Lord.  Jesse and seven of his sons prepare for this time.  Okay, here is the question.  And I know the obvious answer, but it still doesn't make sense to me.  Why doesn't Jesse call David to the sacrifice?  I mean, I know somebody has to tend to the sheep, but where do they put them overnight?  Surely they have a sheepfold.  Isn't Jesse concerned about the spiritual well-being of his youngest son?  How often had Samuel come to town to offer sacrifices to the Lord?  And if David was always the one to tend to the sheep, how many times had he missed this event?  Maybe this is the first and only time Samuel had come to Bethlehem for this.  That would make it even more significant, which should lead Jesse to call in his youngest son.  Did he just overlook the fact that David wasn't there, until Samuel asks if all the boys are present?  Was Jesse just old and tired and didn't notice things as he formerly did?  That could be, but David has seven older brothers who could have summoned him.  I'm wondering if there is a reason David was deliberately left out.  I don't think the fact that he was tending the sheep is enough of a reason for him to be left out of this worship time.  David doesn't have a clue what is going on up in the town, until someone fetches him and brings him to Samuel.  Was this just God's way of further emphasizing that this young man, who obviously was of no account to anyone, that they couldn't even remember to call him from the fields, is the man God selected?  God had His eye on David. 
Every hymn David sang while leading the sheep to pasture, every prayer David said while allowing the sheep to graze, every harp praise offered up while watching for bears and lions, was noticed by God.  David might have felt unimportant doing these little things, but he did them to the best of his ability, and even though he didn't get to worship God in the usual way, by being called to sacrifice, he still worshipped God.  David's worship was real.  It wasn't ritualistic, it wasn't a list of do's and don'ts.  It was heartfelt.  It was genuine.  I think that we all could take a page from David's worship book.  We all could learn to sit quietly and wait on God.  This is not to say we should abandon church and sit in a field as our Sunday worship.  No, but when we are in church, instead of thinking about the grocery list, or the week's schedule, or the lunch menu, intently listening to what God is saying through the speaker.  When we are not in church, studying God's Book.  Singing to him while we are doing our chores, taking a time to pray quietly to Him, and then waiting for a few minutes for an answer.  Memorizing His Word and meditating upon it.  I think David should have been in "church", but he wasn't really given that option.  Nobody told him that "church" was taking place.  Yet, David's worship was still noticed.  It was noticed because this was something David did daily, not just on occasion.  It wasn't a ritual that David followed, it was a love for God, that I don't think his brothers shared.  God could see this in David's heart, and that is why He selected him to be the next king. 
     What is my worship like?  I go to God's House, because that is what God expects of me, and that is where I will learn and grow and serve, but what about when I am not in His House?  Every other day of the week, is my worship genuine?  Is there worship at all?  I should give God praise every day, not just on Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night.  This is why David's worship was so special, it was every day of the week.  God sees me.  Of the billions of people on this earth, and He hears my every prayer, He sees my daily work as worship to Him.  Wiping the table, sweeping the floor, dusting the bookshelves are all acts of worship when I include Him in the process.  The good thing about those chores are that they only take my hands, my heart and mind can be occupied listening to Godly music, memorizing and quoting Scripture, praying for people.  David had all day to think about God, because in his alone time watching the sheep, it only took his hands.  His heart and mind could be occupied elsewhere, and his daily activities became acts of worship to the Lord.  And God noticed him.  When I feel insignificant, when you feel insignificant, remember that God notices everything.  He doesn't miss your dedication to your job.  He doesn't overlook the time you take to make sure things are done right.  He doesn't forget the prayer you said, or the worship you gave him.  He may not make you a king, but you will have a reward, even if it is just that small nudge from the Holy Spirit inside that says, "You did a good job today.  Be proud.  God loves you and He noticed that." 
     Thank You, God, for making me feel so special.  Thank You that wiping down toilets is just as special to You as planning a missionary banquet.  Thank you that changing out bulletin boards is just as important to You as speaking at a conference.  You get all the glory in all of those tasks and nothing we do for You goes unnoticed.

Listening with the Heart

Today's passage:  I Samuel 15:12-35
     Both times when Saul is confronted with his sin of bringing back the Amalekite spoil, he says "they have brought them," and "for the people spared".  He is not willing to take ownership of this deed.  Verse 9 says, "But Saul and the people spared Agag, and the best of the sheep, and of the oxen, and of the fatlings, and the lambs, and all that was good, and would not utterly destroy them..."    Hmmmm.  Who is telling the truth here?  God or Saul? 
     Then Saul tries to justify "their" actions by saying it was for religious reasons, to sacrifice to God.  Were they going to sacrifice King Agag to God too?  I mean, if you are going to make up a story, make sure all the pieces fit.  The Israelites were not known to give up human sacrifices, they left that to their heathen counterparts.  When Samuel presses him about this disobedience, Saul says, "Yea, I have obeyed the voice of the LORD, and have gone the way which the LORD sent me, and have brought Agag the king of Amalek..." Okay, Saul, stop right there.  That's what I would have said if I had been Samuel.  When God said, "Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not..." what part of that sentence meant, and bring the king back to Israel with you?
      Saul further says, "But the people took of the spoil, sheep and oxen, the chief of the things which should have been uterly destroyed..."  What he did was only bring back the king, the people are the real violators here because they brought back the livestock, but he adds, "to sacrifice unto the LORD thy God in Gilgal."  So, really, they were thinking about God so its not as bad as that, is it Samuel?  Even if this was all true, even if Saul had only brought back Agag which God said not to do, the people follow their leader.  If King Saul brings something back, it stands to reason that they would too.        
     Only when Samuel pronounces Saul's punishment does Saul come anywhere close to confessing his sin, and even then, I'm not sure he is repentant.  It is like the child who steals the cookie from the cookie jar and once caught, promises never to do that again, and says over and over, "I love you, Mommy, I love you Mommy, I love you Mommy" to avoid his spanking.  In his confession, he tells Samuel that it is because he feared the people that he disobeyed.  So now it is the people's fault?

Saul tears Samuel's Robe--Taken from Treasures of the Bible
By Henry Davenport Northrop
International Publishing Company, 1894

     Then Samuel says something very interesting to Saul which I think prompts a true confession.  Samuel says, "And also the Strength of Israel will not lie nor repent:  for he is not a man, that he should repent."  It is almost as if Samuel has to go back to the basics with Saul.  He has to remind Saul that God is not a man.  God doesn't lie.  God doesn't make a mistake.  It is almost as if Saul had forgotten that God could not be at fault for this.  Being king, he had been used to laying the blame on others.  It had become his habit to allow others to become his scapegoats.  He couldn't do that with God.  He had forgotten that God will not be a scapegoat.  He needed to be reminded that Someone was higher than the king, and that Someone does not make a mistake.  When Saul realizes this, that he is not going to fool the Lord, he comes clean.  It takes a while to get there, but he is at last able to recognize his wrong, without making excuses, and without throwing anyone else under the bus.
     Saul could fool Samuel.  Saul could fool the elders.  Saul could fool the other nations, but God will never be fooled.  He sees the heart, and it is because He sees the heart that Saul will be replaced.  Maybe Saul was genuinely repentant on this occasion, but God knew that it would take reminder after reminder to make Saul the king he ought to be.  God was not interested in continuing that process, at least, not while Saul was on the throne.  God never gives up on us.  He works with us to get us where He wants us to go, but not always in the position we are in.  Sometimes He has to knock us off our thrones so we will listen.  When we are surrounded by all our worldly comforts, we can drown out His Voice.  It takes a lot to hear Him amid all the distractions.  When He takes things away from us, it is so He can get us to a place where we hear Him.  Really hear Him, not the "Yes, dear" kind of hearing that spouses so often give.  He wants us to listen.  Intently. 
    Does that ever happen for Saul?  I can't see that it does.  He doesn't exactly wear earplugs, more like earmuffs.  He hears God, but he never really listens.  God's instructions are like the adult "Wa, wa, wa" in a Peanuts cartoon.  We can listen with our ears, but if we don't listen with our heart too, we haven't really heard anything.  When God tells us something, and we don't respond emotionally to it, I'm not sure we have actually responded.  Going through the motions, not the emotions.  That doesn't mean we have to be a crying mess in everything we do, but doesn't God say to do things "heartily"?  Saul heard with his ears, but he never heard God with his heart.  When I feel that disconnect with God, in my prayer time, in my Bible time, when I am witnessing to someone, I have to ask myself, am I really listening?  My ears are open, is my heart?

Laboring

Today's passage:  John 16
     "A woman when she is in travail hath sorrow, because her hour is come:  but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world.  And ye now therefore have sorrow:  but I will see you again, and your heart shall rejoice, and your joy no man taketh from you."
     How clearly I remember the birth of my first son.  My poor husband had just worked his shift (4PM-12AM) and had barely been home an hour when my water broke.  I called the doctor and was instructed to go to the hospital.  I didn't have a lot of pain--at first.  Around 2AM the contractions started, and were pretty much non-stop.  I was expecting a breather between each one.  I had been told that when they first start there might be five minutes in between narrowing within a minute of each other.  Now maybe my labor was different from others, but that never happened.  I would say a 30 second delay between each contraction, and that's how it proceeded for hours.  I couldn't turn over in bed without a contraction, I couldn't carry on a conversation without a contraction.  It was certainly more intense than I had ever expected.  Around 3:30AM the nurse asked me if I wanted medication.  I caved.  Mostly because I had no idea how long the labor would last, and I knew I would have no strength to push when the time came.  She administered Stadol which really did nothing but make me groggy.  I could still feel each contraction, I was just too drowsy to be able to protest.  Finally around 9AM I was given an epidural (and when you are having contractions the entire time, it certainly is nerve-wracking trying to stay still when a long needle is about to pierce your back).  In short time, I couldn't feel the contractions anymore.  I really pity the pioneer women.  I have sympathy for the pregnant ladies during the Depression.  Bless the ladies today who choose natural childbirth.  You are braver than I am.  I admit that I am a wimp and a sissy.  I can't imagine having gone another 4 hours with the contractions I was experiencing.  Thank you, Lord, for modern medicine.  Around 12 PM it was time for the most strenuous part of the labor.  Two hours of pushing, and finally my doctor had to use forceps to get him out.  (This tells you a little about the stubbornness of my first child).  I didn't cry, like I expected to when I first held him.  I was just so relieved to be done with the labor process.  No, the tears came later.  When we were alone that first night, and I held him in my arms, I admired each tiny feature and am certain no baby ever born was as handsome as he was (until my second and third son were born, and they are the only ones that I think could ever compare).   In the middle of the labor process, going through those hideous contractions (sorry expectant mothers), I remember thinking to myself, who on earth would ever do this more than once?  But that night, holding my son, I understood why.  Obviously, my first labor experience did not deter me from going through it two more times.  I'm thankful God was more merciful with my next two labors.  Each was only four hours, and far less difficult.
     Jesus is about to experience the worst pain anyone could ever go through.  This would be far more difficult than any woman's labor.  It would be worse than the torture any man has ever experienced, and I've heard of some pretty grueling tortures.  The disciples are about to sorrow as they have never sorrowed before.  They are about to have their world turned upside down.  They will be afraid, upset, discouraged, paranoid.  They will feel deserted and alone.  They will wonder what comes next.  But Jesus explains to them that just as a woman goes through that pain in childbirth, it is only for a short while, then comes the joy for a lifetime.  How true that is!  These disciples were going to have three days of pain and confusion, but following that, they would have a glorious future.  Many of them would experience death in a similar fashion as their Lord, but they would go to a Heavenly home.  Jesus would die such a painful death for me.  He knew the joy on the other side when I would someday accept Him as my Savior.  That would be worth all the pain.  If He had moments on the cross, thinking "Why am I going through this?"  He would think of the many who would believe on Him.  He would think of the joy He would have when each person, one by one, accepted His work on the cross as payment for their sins.  He would think of the disciples boldly going forth after His resurrection and proclaiming His words.  He would think of how Heaven would be filled with the people He loved.  Well, not all the people He loved.  There would still be many who would reject Him.  There would be some at the foot of the cross who would die never believing.  Knowing what He does now, knowing the suffering, the grief, the torture, the pain,  would He do it again?  Yes.  If it was the only way to purchase our salvation, He would do it again.   Why?  Because it was worth it.
     Would I have had another child if I hadn't had the medication that aided me through that first delivery?  Absolutely.  The pain was awful, but if it was the only way to have my child, then I would have no qualms repeating it.  If my second and third deliveries were as intense, I would do those again too.  Why?  Because my kids are worth it.  And for some strange reason, God thinks I'm worth it too.  I don't understand why.  I can only say this.  Maybe somebody today reads this, and can't understand why Jesus would die the way He did.  I don't understand why.  I just understand that He had to.  He had to do it to save our souls.  Nothing we do can ever accomplish what He did on the cross.  No prayer we say, no money we give, no presence in any house of worship, no kindness, no rite of baptism will ever wash away the sin nature we carry with us.  Only Jesus could take care of that.  It is only by believing that His death on the cross accomplished the payment for my sin, that I can have the joy that follows.  It is only by going through the turmoil of recognizing my filthy sins, repenting, and accepting what Christ did for me, that I can understand the eternal joy He brought.  If you have any questions about how you can know about the home in Heaven God has prepared for you, please see the page (Understanding Salvation).  He went through the pain, to bring the joy.  And you are worth it.

Just Furniture

Today's passage:  Isaiah 66
     "Thus saith the LORD, The heaven is my throne, and the earth is my footstool:  Where is the house that ye build unto me?  and where is the place of my rest?  For all those things hath mine hand made, and all those things have been, saith the LORD:  but to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word."
     I'm wondering if the environmentalists have read these verses.  I believe I should certainly be a good steward of all that God has given me.  I believe clean water is important, I should pick up litter, I should turn off the lights when I go out of a room (that's common sense and saves me money).  But to do this and more on the premise that the earth will not be able to survive if I don't, is illogical thinking.  The earth is furniture.  It is the ottoman sitting in a living room.  I can move it around and prop my feet upon it when necessary, but I will go on another day if I didn't have it at all.  God can scrap this world with one word (just as He created it with one word) and I would endure, because He created it as a tool for me.  And what a nice tool it is!

The building of Solomon's temple--Taken from Religion in the Home (Part 4)
By Charlotte M. Yonge, Illustrated by Julius Schnorr Von Karolsfeld
George W. Bertron, 1913

     I'm a tool too.  I'm not an effective one if I don't meet the three qualifications in these verses. God says he will look to one who is poor.  How poor do I need to be?  I was really scratching my head on this one.  If Heaven is the throne, and earth is the footstool, I would imagine that even Solomon and his wealth would seem like a miser compared to God.  I'm not sure that God is purely speaking of material gain.  For if that is the case, in men's eyes I may not be poor, but in God's eyes, I would be a pauper.  Can I leave all that I have behind, and put God first?  I may not have to, but would I be willing?  Maybe God means if I'm willing to be poor for His sake, if I were to give it all up if He asked me to. 
     My understanding of having a contrite spirit is to have an attitude of repentance.  When my husband and I have had a disagreement and I am right (which, of course, I always am--not really) am I willing to ask for forgiveness even though I don't feel I have done anything wrong?  When I have spoken harshly to one of my children when they certainly deserve it, do I tell them I am sorry?  When God has convicted me for my pride for at least as many years as the Cubs have not made it to a World Series, do I admit He's right (which, of course, He always is--no, really).  Do I keep those short accounts with God so that I have a clean slate with Him? 
     The third quality God mentions is trembling at His Word.  When I first read this, I thought to myself, "Oh yeah, God, I do that."  Hmmmm.  Do I?  Can't tremble when I don't read it.  Sure, I read it just about every day.  But then there are months where I don't at all, to my shame.  I always have a good excuse.  After all, I have young children, they get up at all hours.  Just this morning, my late sleeper was the earliest one to rise, just 15 minutes into my devotions this morning.  So maybe I should read it in the evenings.  Well, after the kids go to bed, I just want to relax, and watch some TV.  I'm pretty sure nothing on the television is going to cause me to tremble at His Word.  What am I making most important?  I go to church and listen to His Word.  But how many times during a sermon have I thought to myself," I really hope my husband is listening to this, because He needs this message."  Don't I need it too?  Was there something I missed because I was too busy thinking about how it could benefit someone else?  I may be hoping someone else was trembling, but it certainly wasn't me.
     After examining myself, I'm not certain I'm a very good tool.  With some work, I can possibly be useful.  Maybe if I give everything up, maybe if I tell God I'm sorry more, maybe if I stop making excuses when I didn't read His Word that day.  Maybe, just maybe, He can do something with me after all.  If not, I'm not much more beneficial than the ottoman in the living room.